The Porcelain Bird by Jonathan Wonham

after Rabbit and Pork by Rufo Q

This bird lays its eggs
in collectors' cabinets.
Its cry resembles a toilet flush.
City gents will commonly mark the season
by its unpredictable to-ing and fro-ing,
sometimes looking out for it
in great numbers.

This bird spends winters in Madagascar
where it likes to break things and cause a fuss.
It also tends to perch at night
in childrens' bedrooms
listening to fathers tell stories
of brave boys and naughty little girls.

This bird is not at all threatened
and has been removed
from all the endangered species lists.
If you see one flying past please shoot it
and send the body post-free to us.